So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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