White coat. Heels.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Hippo gnu deer
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
