i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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