Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize