We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize