well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Randomize
