Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He kissed a someone with a penis
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
