It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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