Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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