found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
