I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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