Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
