just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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