Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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