my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
that may or may not have been my penis.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
