Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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