After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
