Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
