Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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