.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
