I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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