That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
