Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
