break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
She said her name was "party"
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
