so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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