her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
