Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
