i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
