Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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