During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize