We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
