why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize