Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
