Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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