so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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