people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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