I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Randomize
