If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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