He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
