so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
