Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
