what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
