He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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