you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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