We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I think im going to throw up on grandma
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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