i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
