I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize