OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
