oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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