i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
