y did u give ur computer a hand job?
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
