Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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