i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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